


Gentle Souls

by brainsteww



Category: Red Dead Redemption (Video Games)
Genre: F/M, Red Dead Redemption 2 Spoilers, Video Game: Red Dead Redemption 2 (2018)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-26
Updated: 2021-01-26
Packaged: 2021-03-18 15:00:47
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,833
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28994097
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/brainsteww/pseuds/brainsteww
Summary: This is a self insert into the world of Red Dead Redemption 2. This is also a Charles Smith x reader fic, so it starts with the reader harboring a small crush on him, and it slowly begins to bloom throughout the series.
Relationships: Charles Smith (Red Dead Redemption)/Reader
Kudos: 11





	Gentle Souls

**Author's Note:**

> Here’s my first fic guys! Sorry if it’s a bit of a mess! This is probably going to have at least 2-3 more chapters, so hopefully, you guys enjoy it. ❣️ Any feedback is very much appreciated! :-))
> 
> Word count: 2,834
> 
> Warnings: slight mentions of depression, language
> 
> (Tumblr: morganmarston)

Colter is where it started.  
The snow was coming down, softly blanketing the hard ground. The cold and the almost eerie silence of your surroundings seemed to mirror everyone’s low spirits. You stepped out of your assigned cabin for a quick smoke, the small living quarters making you feel a bit like a caged animal. You opened your cigarette tin and began to grab a small amount of loose tobacco. While your nearly numb fingers readied your tobacco paper, you overheard Pearson's voice. 

“We’re going to starve to death up here, Mister Morgan.”  
“We’re okay,” you hear Arthur say dismissively.  
As you fumbled to finish rolling your cigarette you somewhat zoned out their conversation, only really getting bits and pieces. Something about Pearson sending Bill and Lenny out hunting, and them coming back empty-handed. You chuckled as you heard Arthur call Bill a fool.  
As you took a long drag, your attention was brought back to their conversation  
when you heard Charles speak.

“Enough of this. We’ll go find something. Come on Arthur.”  
His gruff voice was quick to end the conversation, urgent to get something done.  
As Charles turned to begin walking to the horses, Arthur spoke again.  
“You can’t go hunting. Look at your hand!”  
“I can’t stay here listening to you two.  
Look, if there’s game in those hills, I’ll find it... And you can kill it.”  
“You need to rest Charles!”  
“You think this is rest?” He was quick to retort back. “Come along.”  
And with that, Charles turned around again to head to the horses, not leaving another second up to argue. You liked how quickly Charles took action, and the promise of food slightly lifted your spirits. You waved to both of them as they got on their horses, both men nodding in your direction before they took off. 

When they arrived a while later, you were shocked to see that they had brought back not one, but two deer to feed the camp. One doe, and one very large buck. In the time they had gone, the wind had picked up. Snowflakes were flying every which way in the winter storm and the overall morale in the camp had stayed at a grim state. The promise of a warm, full meal lighted everyone's spirits in the camp; for just a second, it seemed as if the weight on everyone's shoulders had lessened.  
And that's when it started. That's when you started to really look at Charles. Sure, you’d been harboring a bit of an innocent crush towards him. You hadn't thought much of it though, not thinking it would go anywhere. But this was really the turning point, when you began to feel comfort and warmth in his presence, his words, and his promises.  
—————  
After your first decent meal in what felt like an eternity, you walked out of the  
cabin for some fresh air. It was still frigid and crisp out, which was oddly relaxing compared to the tight quarters and all the bodies in your cabin. You hated feeling so cooped up. You wanted to feel productive and like you weren’t just helplessly sitting around. You had tried to busy yourself by doing what you could around camp - little chores here and there. You even took the liberty of changing John's bandages for fresh ones and bringing him his share of the deer stew Pearson had cooked. You soon felt restless, however, and your mind wandered to how quickly Charles had wanted to get out of camp and do something as well; it almost perfectly mirrored how you felt now and it further sparked the urge to be by him.

You weren’t sure where he was staying, so you wandered towards the Cabin  
you knew Lenny, Bill, Micah, and Javier shared to find Arthur and Lenny standing out front with their hands hovering above the scout fire for warmth. You quickly waved at them as you approached. “Hey, guys! How’re ya’ll feeling?” You grinned at their huddled forms, your question mostly a rhetorical one. They grinned back, and you warmed your hands with them from a brief second. “Hey, have either of you guys seen Charles?”, you asked, rather timidly.  
Arthur quirked an eyebrow at you, and you grinned again. “I was just wondering if he’d take me out hunting too. Gettin’ kinda fed up of sitting around here.”  
“You know how to hunt, don’t you Y/N?” Lenny teased. You rolled your eyes jokingly and softly chuckled. “Yeah yeah yeah, I know how to hunt. I figured some practice couldn’t hurt though. And, well, some peace and quiet would be nice too. I swear if I hear any more out of Swanson, I might set up camp outside.” Both men nodded in understanding, a fresh cloud of visible air floating into the breeze when Arthur exhaled as he nodded in the direction of the building Pearson set up for cooking. “Last I saw him, he went around the side there, probably working on one of his carvings.” “Thanks, Arthur!” you enthusiastically chime as you start heading in that direction. Sure enough, as you turn the corner of the building, you find Charles leaning against the wall whittling away at a small chunk of wood, glancing up at you as he notices your presence. He’s all bundled up against the cold, the collar of his coat propped up, and his hat was worn over a hooded scarf of sorts. Your eyes move to the scars on his face, and then to his eyes. You suddenly became very aware that you were staring at him, and you could feel his eyes on you as well, the realization quickly making you shy, as you began to speak to him. “Hey Charles, I was looking for you!”  
He exhaled quietly, his expression soft, as were his words as he gently said: “Well, you found me Y/N.”  
“Um, since you took Arthur out hunting earlier, I was wonderin’ if you’d take me out as well?” He was quiet for a second, as he thought about your question.  
“Hmm, well, we’ve got enough food for a couple of days now. But, I suppose it couldn't hurt to see what we can find out there. You ready to go right now?” His expression was a little hard to read, but you were relieved that he didn’t seem to mind your request. You knew Charles well enough to know he likely wouldn't have.  
“Yeah! The sooner the better.”  
With that, he pocketed his knife and unfinished carving, giving you a quick nod as he began to head to the horses, with you following close behind.  
\----------  
You’d been riding for a little while now, your time with Charles thus far quiet for the most part, minus some friendly banter and quickly catching up. Being away from camp finally allowed you to really be able to think- and that was both good, and bad. You were fairly new to the gang, having become part of the family no more than about a year before Charles joined, and that was only about seven or eight months now. You’d fit into the group quite nicely, becoming pretty close with Arthur, Charles, Mary Beth, Tilly, John, Javier, and Hosea. You struggled, however, with feeling out of place. This wasn’t a new feeling for you though, having struggled with feeling out of place for most of your childhood, and into adulthood. At this point in your life, you knew this feeling would follow you anywhere you went, it was a part of you and you knew that. These people were your friends, your family, and you felt at home. You were happy with these outlaws and misfits - you knew there wasn't much to be done, and that your issue wasn't one of an external battle, but instead that of an internal battle. It made you feel isolated sometimes, and you hated that. It made you push others away sometimes, and you were aware that that’s exactly what you were doing now. A little bit of space from camp was what you had needed, and you felt refreshed as the cool air flowed through your hair, filling your lungs. You closed your eyes as you took a long intake of breath, and slowly exhaled.  
A literal breath of fresh air.  
Unbeknownst to you, Charles had taken notice of your quiet and reflective state. He usually kept to himself anyway, but there was something about the look on your face that made him think what you had really needed was to get out of camp. And what else was that, that look in your eyes? Sadness? He thought about his words carefully, before he spoke to you.  
“You know (Y/N), we’ve passed quite a few deer and rabbit tracks so far, did you have a specific animal in mind for a special stew?” His tone was light, despite his deep voice.  
You chuckled, a little embarrassed as you realized just how in your head you had been.  
“Sorry Charles, I was in another world. I guess considering our recent circumstances, I haven't had much time alone with my thoughts.”  
He nodded as he looked at you, slowing Taima so you two could comfortably talk if need be.  
“Do you... Want to talk about it?”  
You were a bit taken aback at his open concern for you, seeing as how Charles seemed to avoid conversation and enjoy his silence. You smiled, his genuine interest making you feel warm and comfortable. You knew that even though Charles seemed a tad bit out of his comfort zone, his attempt at opening up to you was a sincere one, so after a quick glance at him, you tried your best to explain how you felt to him.  
“You know Charles, most people can’t tell when something is racking my brain. And even if they can seem to tell I'm bothered, they never ask me how I’m doing. I know they mean well, and would talk to me if I asked for help, but other than you, Arthur or Hosea, no one really bothers. So, thank you for that. It means a lot.  
Charles gave you a quick nod, which was accompanied by his gentle smile. For a second there, you could swear you felt butterflies at the sight. You continued.  
“I don’t really know where to start, honestly. Most of my life, I've felt like I don’t belong. Not just with others, but even... With myself? I know that probably doesn't make much sense, but that's the best way I can describe the feeling. And in times like this, when we’re stuck and waiting for better days, this feeling I usually have, it seems to be magnified. And I dunno, it’s just hard to talk about for me. Doesn't seem like people usually get it.” You give a quick, humorless chuckle. “Ahh, I guess I can't say I blame ‘em. I don’t get it much myself. And, I’d say we’ve got more important things to be worrying about anyhow, what with those Pinkertons on our tail.”  
You’re quiet for a moment, slightly embarrassed at how much you’ve told Charles. You glance over at him, and you’re surprised to find him already looking at you. The sound of your horses sloshing through the snow and their gentle snorts, the soft clanking of your holstered weapons, all sound fades away for a minute as you look back at Charles. The look in his eyes quickly registers; Sadness. You know right away, that Charles understands.  
“I think I know what you mean, Y/N. If I'm honest, I often find it easier to be on my own.”  
Charles was quiet for a moment, seemingly trying to find the right words. “Life has always confused me. I don’t have much figured out, I just try doing what I can every day and that seems to work. Some days are better than others, but those good days often make the not so great times worth it. What helps me, is setting my mind to something. Even if it’s little tasks. I’ve noticed, though, that my time with all of you has made the days easier.” You looked on at him, unable to look away from his eyes. His gaze met yours as he continued. He faltered slightly, seemingly still not sure how to go on. “Look, I know I’m not that great at this. I guess all I can say is to live in the present, try to enjoy what you can when you can. And, being around people who care always helps. This odd little family we share, well, just don’t forget that you’re cared for. I might not be the best company, but I’m here if you ever need anything.” His gaze didn't falter and you couldn’t stop the grin that quickly spread across your face. “Thank you, Charles, that means more than you know.” He smiled as he gave you a quick nod, his eyes lingering for a second before he brought his attention back to the path ahead of you. You softly chuckled, happily relishing in the fact that not only had Charles opened up to you but that he wanted to be there to support you as well. “I don’t think I’ve ever heard you say so much mister Smith!” You quipped. “I quite like it.” He chuckled and you both rode on in comfortable silence for a couple more minutes before he spoke up again. “You know what? I have something I’d like to show you. Follow me.” He glanced at you quickly for approval and at your nod, swiftly changed course with you following close behind.  
You quickly made your way to what you could now see was Lake Isabella. Charles slowed and you both quickly dismounted your horses as you neared the lake. He turned to you as you both slowly walked through the snow. He was quiet as he walked. Curious and slightly confused as to what you both were there for, you reached out to his shirt sleeve and softly pulled, timid as he turned around and smiled at you. “Sorry for being so secretive,” he softly spoke, “I don’t want to spoil it, give me a second.” You watched as he tracked some prints in the snow, both of you only a couple feet from the lake. As you rounded a large tree, Charles suddenly crouched down, his hand brushing against your shoulder to signal you do the same. You look at him quizzically as he points to an opening of trees ahead of you by the lake, and then you see him. A beautiful, lone bison. He’s massive, and even more remarkably, white in color. Your breath catches in your throat as he slowly walks to the edge of the lake for a sip of water. He’s a sight to behold, almost unreal. Charles' voice brings you back to reality. “I saw him when I was out for a ride the other day.” You look at him as he explains, his voice barely a whisper as he continues. “I couldn’t bring myself to hunt him, let alone disturb him. And I sure as hell didn’t dare let anyone know he was here.” Your eyes were wide as you listened to him, words unable to formulate how touched you were he’d share this with you. He smiled at your expression as he proceeded, both of you looking back at the bull as he slowly sloshed through the snow. “This guy, he’s all on his own out here. But, looking at him I don't think twice about how resilient he must be. He’s..he’s one of a kind. He’s strong all on his own. He’s made it this far despite the cold around him, despite any hardships he may have faced.” The Bison was now taking in its surroundings, he stood still as he breathed in the air, a gentle snort coming from him as a rabbit bounded by him. He paid no mind to it, only slowly looking in its direction before he pushed his snout into the snow before him, looking for any vegetation under the frozen white blanket. “A gentle soul. At peace with himself and his surroundings.” At his words, you looked back at Charles. You could feel your chest swell with emotion, his gesture really hitting home for you as you realized he was doing his best to make you feel better. Unable to contain yourself, you quickly hug him. At first, he’s stiff, and you worry that you’ve made him uncomfortable. You begin to pull away but he quickly warms into the embrace and holds you, not ashamed to share this moment and all that comes with it. In that moment, the frigid air, the frozen ground, and the snowflakes that softly fell around you were lost to the feeling that welled inside of you. All you felt, all you knew was warmth. You could get used to this feeling.


End file.
